Holiday!

Me: Morning Sam, it's 10 past 7, time to get up

Sam: I got no school

Me: Oh? How come?

Sam: Antarctic day off

You all heard it here first. 28th of March is to now be known as Antarctic Day - even better, it's a holiday! Yay!

A good Kettle anecdote

Me: Wake up Sam

Sam: Come on, tell me the story

Me: What story?

Sam: I thought you were going to tell me an anectdote about a kettle?

Anyone got a good kettle anectdote I can tell him? It might help wake him up in time to go to school...

Morning Rules....

Me: Morning Sam, time to get up

Sam: You tell me!

Surely Sam is aware of the rules of being a youth by now? He sleeps, I tell him to get up.

Me 'n Skepta - yeah...

Me: Sam, it's time to get up

Sam: You have a song with him.

Me: I do? Who?

Sam: Skepta

Doing our world tour shortly...you do want tickets for that! Believe me....

Career chomping...

Me: Sam, time to wake up, love

Sam: He's scary

Me: Who is?

Sam: That guy. He says he is going to eat his career.

Me: Gosh! What IS his career?

Sam: Basketball

Me: Why would he want to eat his career?

Sam: Cos he wants to be big and black

Me: How will that work?

Sam: Not HIS career! Someone elses.

Ah. I see. Not.

No emerging here....

Me: Sam, time to wake up

Sam: I’m not emerging, whatever that is

Me: Emerging from what?

Sam: From power.

Wow. Sam is not emerging from power. Let alone from his bed!

iLolly...

Me: Morning Sam. time to wake up

Sam: Yeah, but the phone is frozen

Me: Oh! What do you mean?

Sam: I can't call anyone

Ah! So THAT's how I can keep the phone bills down. Put the phone in the freezer! Nice tip, Sam!

I'm being noticed...

Crikey! Now the other one's at it! My middle son, Oliver...

Me: Oliver, time to wake up

Oliver: I haven't seen that notice before!

Me: What notice?

Oliver: The one with the picture of you...

Has anyone else noticed it? Did I become famous overnight?

Maths problem....

Me: Sam, time to get up.

Sam: Equals?

I have to say, I was rubbish at maths so this had me pretty flummoxed...